Southern Minn: “Skol!” to the North Star State

We made it to Minnesota, where we will spend almost a month. We last visited in 2019, and loved it. Once again, the temps are fab, and so far anyway, the mosquitoes are practically non-existent. This is extraordinary since the mosquito is practically Minnesota’s state bird.

LANESBORO, MINN

Our first stop was the small town of Lanesboro, and it’s little twin sister, Whalan (population 69), set in the picturesque bluffs of Southern Minnesota. They must have heard we were coming, and threw a festival in our honor!

We came because of a terrific 42-mile paved bike path through the woods called the Root River State Trail. It connects multiple small town along the path of an old railroad route.

Since “Crash” Miller has been hit by cars three times while biking (one necessitating two back surgeries and years of rehab), we like these paths where the only cross-traffic is a darting chipmunk.

The trail runs alongside the Root River, where tubers serenely float their cares away. The lazy river loop begins at the historic Stone Gravity Dam, masterly built by hand in 1868 and still creating hydroelectric power for the town, with RV sites above.

Old farm buildings, cute trailside shops, and lots of shade complete the tableau.

The real star of the show is the trailside Aroma Pie Shop in Whalan. People come from far and wide to buy pie here, but arrive before noon or they will be out of most flavors. It was definitely outrageously good!

Its walkable downtown is home to locally owned boutiques and restaurants. And a dog-friendly brewery!

The most-clever downtown attraction is the Lanesboro Phone Booth. A real-live phone from 1950 to 2016, it was decommissioned and turned into an storytelling kiosk. Push the appropriate button and hear tales from Lanesboro’s history — no coin required!

The buildings and homes in Lanesboro and Whalan are absolutely adorbz, like a throwback in time.

We REALLY threw it back in time when we stayed awake all the way until 11 PM (!!) for a impromptu rave at our campground. We heard “DJ Dewy” would be appearing on a Friday night and assumed him to be a young local celebrity on the rise. Imagine our surprise when he appeared to be older than Philip! But no matter — he got the crowd rockin’ for 4 full hours — polkas, macarenas, YMCA, all the classics, plus rock, disco, country and more.

Here’s to living your dream at any age! We should all strive to be like Dewy, who rocked our world this simple Friday night in Lanesboro, Minnesota.

AUSTIN, MINN: SPAM MUSEUM

Our good friend Pete wryly calls us “Connoisseurs of the Bizarre” and I wear that badge with honor! On our way to Minneapolis, we stopped in the small town of Austin for a cultural touchstone: The SPAM Museum!

That’s right, there a museum for everything, and this one celebrates the canned meat’s peculiar place in pop culture. I told Philip we were going to the Spam Museum and he envisioned a cramped, dusty storefront with an ancient caretaker and seriously creepy vibes. Turns out, not so much!

Nope, this one is a bright, cheerful place where Spambassadors (yes, they’re really called that) invite you into their Spamtacular 14,000 square foot building (and yes, they will really wish you a Spamtacular Day), and where the signage urges you, “Please don’t eat the exhibits.”

The iconic canned meat was first created right here in Austin in 1937. But it was World War II and the need for an easily transported, long-lasting, shelf-stable meat that really launched Spam into the stratosphere. Learn how Spam supported the troops in WWII (too well, it turns out, as the excessive amount supplied meant Spam for three meals a day and everyone was sick of it).

What is Spam? All spam products are made of six simple ingredients and the letters stand for “spiced ham,” except the version that is made with turkey, but “Spurkey” doesn’t have much of a ring to it.

Nine galleries full of memorabilia, interactive videos, and hands-on activities take place under a “Spam Train” of 780 cans chugging around a track above your head. Take a picture with the one-and-only Spammy!

A fave activity for kids of all ages (including us) was the Spam “factory.” You can don an optional hard hat and frock and then work the “assembly line” to see how fast you can assemble Spam products. (Philip’s record: 19 seconds! He’s hired!) More than 44,000 cans come down the real assembly line every hour.

Spam is “on the menu” in 44 countries, and the Spam World Market explores Spam culture all around the world, with 15 flavors including Tacino, Korean BBQ, Gochujang and more. South Korea is the 2nd largest consumer of Spam products (behind the U.S.) and Spam branded gift sets are even the preferred gift for family and friends during two Korean holidays, Thanksgiving and Lunar New Year.

Our son-in-law is of Korean descent, and before his mother Sunny passed away from cancer, she taught our daughter Sarah all of her favorite recipes … one including Spam, which we can attest is deeee-lish! You can buy kimchi in most groceries and even Costco now — wanna give it a try?

Sarah’s been meaning to try Budae Jigae, or “Army Stew” (made with Spam, kimchi, hot pepper paste and ramen noodles) so we sent her the recipe from one of the museum kiosks, and would you believe ….. the email went to her Spam folder!!! Hardee har har — get it??! just a little Spam humor for ya. I’m here all week, folks.

In the U.S., Hawaii consumes more Spam than any other state, and Spam is sold not only in grocery stores, but also at 7-Eleven, McDonalds and Burger King. We bought a few cans from the gift shop, returned to the Spam Museum parking lot and made a Teriyaki Spam stir-fry for lunch.

Such is the luxury of traveling in an RV — instant gratification for our stomachs’ every desire!

MINNEAPOLIS, MINN

We don’t generally like traveling to large cities — traveling through a metropolis in a 35-foot RV (and towing a Jeep) is challenging, and RV campgrounds are usually located far outside the city and the things we want to see. We made an exception for Minneapolis, however, for two bucket-list items!

Prince’s Paisley Park

Just outside Minneapolis in Chanhassen, Paisley Park is the incredible work/life space of The Artist Formerly Known as Prince. We were shocked to find it looked like an ordinary office building (and not purple, and not paisley). But the symbol in front gave it away.

After rising from child prodigy to international superstar, Prince Rogers Nelson built this place, that is now the cornerstone of his legacy, in 1987. 90-minute tours focus solely on the musical side of his legacy, with zero focus on his personal life.

It was not only his personal sanctuary, but an incredible production complex for Prince and hundreds of other musicians and groups. Unfortunately, they disable visitors’ cell phones until the very last room of the tour, but I’ll share with ya a little of what I’m able to.

The fascinating tour included ever-changing artifacts, including rare musical instruments, artwork, and stories of his legacy, both pre- and post-breakup with Warner Brothers Records, whom he loathed for their attempts to contain and control his creative genius, which triggered the name change (or would that be NON-name change?) to the unpronounceable symbol associated with Prince. You really have to admire his gumption.

Prince wasn’t just a musician — he was one of the original style icons. Paisley Park displays just a few of the thousands of costumes custom designed for the 5’2″, 112-pound artist. Everyone associates the color purple with Prince, but his sister confirmed his favorite color was actually orange!

The last room of the tour was a private nightclub, where Prince might jam with Madonna, or throw a private concert for the Minnesota WNBA team after they won the championships. Mere mortals like you and I would only be here if we knew somebody who knew somebody who had insider access who had a secret code word to a secret text message. That kinda thing. But today, you can buy a caffeinated beverage and sit here and ponder how your life could have been different if …… if only …..

When he died of an accidental fentanyl overdose in the elevator of this very place, he had no will. So his $300 million fortune was divided amongst his sister and five half-siblings, some of whom he didn’t even like. So this is your public service reminder to update your estate planning documents, and/or check Ancestry.com for any long-lost, rich, celebrity relatives you didn’t knew you had.

The Minnesota Vikings Stadium (U.S. Bank)

U.S. Bank Stadium is not only home to the Minnesota Vikings, but also the NCAA Men’s Final Four, the Summer X Games, and Super Bowl LII. It’s smack dab in the middle of downtown, which provides parking challenges, but super-cool city skyline reflections in this new, modern building.

Despite being the hometown hero, Prince’s only Super Bowl halftime performance –widely considered one of the greatest in Super Bowl history– was delivered NOT in Minneapolis, but rather, in the pouring rain in Miami in 2007. Nevertheless, a really cool painting of Prince is displayed in the Vikings stadium. It’s like a “word search puzzle” if you look at the letters that make up the painting, real close.

When we visited, a medical/insurance group was having a private party in the bottom of the stadium. The tour guide woefully informed us that we would not get to go down onto the field. Booooo!

But at the last minute …. just like in an exciting football game …. the tide turned and we made it onto the field anyway! Woot woot!! The Vikings’ newest center took to the field.

The stadium is chock full of Scandinavian references: the Norseman Lounges, the Valhalla Suites, etc. They even have their very-own chant: during a game, Viking fans raise their hands and after two beats of a drum, they clap in time and yell, “Skol!” The tempo increases until it’s nonstop applause.

Perhaps the most iconic symbol of the Vikings is the horn, officially called the Gjallarhorn. According to Norse mythology, it was sounded to announce the arrival of the gods. Since 2007, the Gjallarhorn has signaled THE VIKINGS ARE COMING and the start of a great battle on the gridiron.

The stadium is relatively new, circa 2016, and the horn is new, too. The original (more authentic looking) horn fell apart into four big chunks one day, after being rolled onto the old field. It might have had something to do with the fact that their old stadium was outdoors, in a place where temperatures can reach -41 degrees F.

This was our fourth stadium tour nationwide — though we have yet to tour our hometown Arizona Cardinals stadium! Oh, the horrors of our treachery — please don’t tell our QB Kyler Murray!

Like most stadium tours, we got to go into the locker room. The Vikings face is on the ceiling rather than the floor, because it’s considered bad luck to walk over your own logo.

Many people consider Randy Moss to be perhaps the best Viking ever; however, my vote is for Cris Carter (1990-2001). He was released by the Eagles in 1989 because of substance abuse issues. The Vikings saw past that and picked him up for $100. He went on to turn his life around and become one of the most prolific players in the NFL! SKOL to an epic turnaround story! Another cool feature in the stadium is the wall with hundreds of helmets, one for each of the high school in Minnesota.

With only a few weeks to go until the start of another NFL season, the tour was a great way to HONOR THE GAME!

From Minneapolis, we headed to the North Shore area of Lake Superior — the largest freshwater lake by surface in the whole wide world — holding more water than all the other Great Lakes combined!